A letter to you I would never send

March, 24th 2015.

Maybe one day we'd meet again, when we all have grown up into a different person and maybe I'd tell you everything and when I do tell you, I wouldn't feel anything like I used to. I wouldn't feel a twinge of hurt or sadness whenever I thought about you. I would laugh when I tell you everything, because maybe one day everything would seem so stupid and funny.

Maybe one day we'd meet again, in a cafe, and I am with someone else, and you're with someone else. And I would say hi to you without feeling anything at all, because I'm happy with whoever I am with and I am happy seeing you happy with whoever you're with.

Maybe one day you'd see me the way I used to see yourself, with complete adoration and awe that makes your heart beat faster and fill your stomach with butterflies. Maybe you'd understand why my cheeks flushed whenever you smile at me, because you finally feel the same way I used to feel about you.

Maybe one day you'd feel all those things I used to feel and you'd realize how foolishly in love I was with you back then. You'd realize how much I adored you and how the little things you did make me flush so stupidly and how willingly I wanted to give you everything I had back then but when you realize that, I wouldn't be so in love with you anymore. You'd want to see me and tell me how you've realized everything and how you feel the same away about me but when you do see me, you'd see me happily in love with someone and maybe it'd stop you dead in your track when you see me smiling at him in a sheepish way I used to smile at you. Maybe your stomach would drop when you see me looking at him with all the adoration and love I used to give to you. Maybe your heart would break when you see him making me laugh until my stomach hurts because you never did that to me on purpose. And you would walk away and give up, just like what I did back then. You wouldn't get the chance to say everything you want to say, just like the way I didn't get the chance to say everything to you back then. All your words would be left unsaid, just like how all my words are still left unsaid until now.

Maybe one day you'd finally realized what you had lost when you were too hung up chasing everything else and maybe one day I'd finally realize that I was a fool for spending so much time thinking and dreaming about you.

Maybe one day we'd meet again, when we're different and mature enough to accept everything.